So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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