Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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