Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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