But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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