You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
