Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
