it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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