haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
