This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
