drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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