do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Randomize
