burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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