Is it normal to miss your booty call?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
