the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
