nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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