Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I cut my penus on the lid.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
