I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
