I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
