no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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