Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
