we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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