He is such a slut. More and more my type.
false alarm. still invincible.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
