Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
