JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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