i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize