Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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