His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
