Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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