Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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