If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
