It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
