i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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