When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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