i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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