so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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