Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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