Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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