do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
