wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
