Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
