She is in my trunk
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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