He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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