She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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