super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
