I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
how drunk are you?
Several
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
