She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
