Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
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