I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
