I feel like I'm in dance class right now
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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