Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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